How to Cope with Bad Memories
Wouldn’t it be nice if you could just get hypnotized to forget your more painful memories? Unfortunately, the experts say this cannot be done. However, there are coping strategies that you can use to make those memories less painful.
Some of us have terrible memories of such things as being bullied at school, losing a parent at a young age or even childhood violence, abuse or rape. These memories tend to ferment in our minds until they just seem to boil and sometimes the problem is handled with through drugs or alcohol. These are not solutions but rather Band Aides to cover up how we feel.
Such memories can also cripple you with a negative self-image and must be dealt with, as this can hold you back in every aspect of your life from getting a good job to having healthy, happy relationships. You must consciously create a new and positive self-image based on who you are today – not who you might have been in the past. To assist you in doing this, here area few tips:
1) Whenever you hear your mind belittling you in some way (you are so stupid or you don’t deserve to have whatever.) immediately replace that thought with a positive one. Keep doing this and eventually, you will automatically think positive things about yourself. It is a matter of reprogramming your mind.
2) Recall the negative memory and try to find a positive in it. For instance, did that experience make you a more understanding person? Did it help you cope with events that occurred later in life? It helps to understand that everything happens for a reason.
3) Is there someone from your past that you truly hate because of what they did to you? There is no way to get past this except to forgive that person. I know this can be terribly difficult, but it may help to know that we are all on our own path in life and along that path, lessons (no matter how difficult) are placed in front of us to be learned. That person was on his or her own path and karma will come into play at some point. By hating, you only hurt yourself.
4) Realize that the past is just that: the past. Why let it ruin your future?
Some of us have terrible memories of such things as being bullied at school, losing a parent at a young age or even childhood violence, abuse or rape. These memories tend to ferment in our minds until they just seem to boil and sometimes the problem is handled with through drugs or alcohol. These are not solutions but rather Band Aides to cover up how we feel.
Such memories can also cripple you with a negative self-image and must be dealt with, as this can hold you back in every aspect of your life from getting a good job to having healthy, happy relationships. You must consciously create a new and positive self-image based on who you are today – not who you might have been in the past. To assist you in doing this, here area few tips:
1) Whenever you hear your mind belittling you in some way (you are so stupid or you don’t deserve to have whatever.) immediately replace that thought with a positive one. Keep doing this and eventually, you will automatically think positive things about yourself. It is a matter of reprogramming your mind.
2) Recall the negative memory and try to find a positive in it. For instance, did that experience make you a more understanding person? Did it help you cope with events that occurred later in life? It helps to understand that everything happens for a reason.
3) Is there someone from your past that you truly hate because of what they did to you? There is no way to get past this except to forgive that person. I know this can be terribly difficult, but it may help to know that we are all on our own path in life and along that path, lessons (no matter how difficult) are placed in front of us to be learned. That person was on his or her own path and karma will come into play at some point. By hating, you only hurt yourself.
4) Realize that the past is just that: the past. Why let it ruin your future?
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